We need to talk about male suicide | Steph Slack | TEDxFolkestone

Big Boys Do Cry

My Story. 

Let me take you back to 1995, at the time I had a little office next door to a Hair Salon. Every morning the owner of the salon would drive past on his way to park his car and give me a cheery wave and.. every few weeks we would both come into work early and he would cut my hair before our respective staff arrived.

Stick with me… the story does get more interesting…

Of course, as he cut my hair we would chat about sport and politics and anything and everything and overtime a friendship developed – he was a nice guy, always cheerful and a pleasure to be with.  One particular sunny day in June, Richard drove past as usual and we exchanged our waves and grins, but then, strangely, after ten minutes or so he drove out again giving me a shrug and a slightly wry smile.   I thought nothing of it, supposing that he had forgotten to bring in or to do something.

An hour later an assistant from t the salon, popped in: Had I seen Richard? she asked.  He had opened up the salon and simply disappeared without a word. Very strange.  I knew something was wrong when later that day when a police car turned up.  A body had been found at the bottom of Beachy Head.  It was Richard.

As a friend I was devastated and as, in my spare time, I also manned the emergency lines for Samaritans deeply affected. I had no idea that he was distressed, despairing, suicidal  -  call it what you will. He presented the world with his happy face and cheerful personality and hid his inner thoughts and demons well.   If only I had told him I was a Samaritan… If only I had the skill to seek out his underlying problems. If only.

The church was packed, standing room only for his funeral but… I couldn’t go. It hurt too much.

So, why am I telling you ‘My Story’  - you knew I would get around to it in the end..  It’s because I need your support for the Big boys do cry initiative.  We are going to run a poster campaign to break down the barriers that prevent us Men from seeking help when we run out of options.  

The posters are planned to be on the back of l buses and in pubs, clubs, sports facilities, factories, shopping centres, service stations and in fact wherever men congregate.  They will include the number for Samaritans and possibly other helplines.

But these posters cost money  – so we have set up a fund to pay for this… and here’s the crunch..  we need your money - and to encourage you to part with your hard earned cash, me and 5 members of my family are going to be thrown out of an airplane at 3 miles above the planet where we will free fall at 125 miles an hour before, hopefully, our chutes will open and we will float slowly back to earth.  We are scared, we are terrified and petrified. But we will do it if you will kindly sponsor us?

Please click on this link: www.virginmoneygiving.com/bigboysdocry and give what you can. Together we can really make a difference.